Chasing Brumbies – the big WHY
2019 Hume and Hovell 100 mile race report by Joe Ward
The big WHY!
100 mile runners (and ultra runners) are very familiar with the big WHY. It’s a vital component to completing your race and at the same time, the big WHY is unique for every individual runner.
The big WHY is the foundation stone of your training program. The WHY can make or break your race. The big WHY is incredibly powerful and often times elusive. The WHY is the thing that keeps you training and keeps you moving forward when uncertainty and self doubt inevitably come knocking.
WHY run 100 miles? WHY do you do it? WHY do you run these distances?
Sometimes we forget the importance of our WHY. This can be through overconfidence, ego or just a misinterpretation of our true inner motivations. Do you really run to win? Is that really the main reason? Do you run for performance or to lose weight? Maybe this inner examination helps us to understand some of the benefits of running but the BIG WHY goes deeper than these superficial benefits.
The true WHY of why you run, is the key to your greatest success. Your best race, your best performance, the best YOU resides in that place where you are perfectly aligned with your deepest, truest expression of your unique purpose.
Too wordy? I’m sorry. Lets make things more simple …
“When you run on the earth and with the earth, you can run forever.” -Tarahumara saying
So WHY do I run?
This is the question I was forced to ask myself during the GNW 100 miles this year. I pulled out at 32kms simply because I wasn’t having fun. I was frustrated, confused and a little pissed off to be back at square one.
You would think by now, I would have a clear answer for this question. I’ve run this distance (and further) 10, 15, 20 times now. I should have this question answered and memorised. But the big WHY is elusive. As you move, it moves too. As you evolve and change as an athlete, so does the big WHY.
Maybe you started, like me, for superficial reasons. To quit smoking, lose weight, make your ex girlfriend jealous? Running is incredibly powerful, it changes lives but what happens when your WHY changes?
I realised my WHY had changed in September this year so I had to go back to the beginners mind and rediscover my WHY.
I’ve been through this process before so I knew the best way to rediscover my WHY was to sign up for another race immediately and get back on the horse (pun subconsciously intended).
HUME AND HOVELL 2019 race day
I’d heard great things about this race (thanks Stephen Redfern!!) so I was keen to use the Hume and Hovell to rediscover my WHY.
You could call it, getting the monkey off my back, recharging my batteries, rediscovering my mojo but for a 100 mile race it goes deeper than this. The WHY is deeply personal and I had to go deep to find it.
I think the best way to describe how it feels to run a 100 mile race is like an ayahuasca trip. It’s painful, a bit crazy but on the other side it offers deep insights into the human experience.
I wanted to go into this experience in the purest way possible to get the maximum benefit so I gave up coffee and hit the meditation app. My build up was less than ideal in terms of weekly volume but the purpose was to find my WHY so I was happy to surrender to whatever unfolded on race day and embrace the experience.
My mantra became “Burn the boats.” This was a technique generals would use when they invaded an island to ensure their men would achieve victory. I was entering this event with the minimal of fuss and with no “get out of jail free” cards or back up plans. My hotel was a 10km drive from the start line and I only had one person in my support crew. The amazing Jon Richardson. Jon is an awesome athlete, a great friend and a calm, methodical dude. I had everything I needed for the battle ahead. The boats were BURNED!!!
As the race began, self doubt and anxiety hovered over me as I ran the first few kms. It was great to chat with Grant Brisbin, who I hadn’t raced with for a couple of years. Together we helped calm the early nerves of the race and we ran sensibly over the “warm up” stages. One or two other runners raced ahead but we both knew without saying a word that it was too early to push.
It was also great to chat with Dale Chircop who runs the Down Under 135 and Kevin “Brick” Heaton, an ultra running legend and gentleman of the sport.
My heart rate kept spiking up to 160 BPM around 25kms which was a little disconcerting but apart from that, the first part of the race was gratefully uneventful.
At 44kms, I saw Jon at the Checkpoint and he handed me a Vegemite and Tomato sandwich. This was magic and really recharged my energy levels. As I headed towards 60kms, I found myself in third place and an American guy was chasing me into each checkpoint. Every time I arrived and grabbed a cup of water, he was only a few seconds behind. I decided it was time for some caffeine (my first caffeine hit for 4 weeks!) and this helped me start to pull away.
It was great to run with some of the 100km runners before the turn around, including Mark Avery who’s preparing to run the Brisbane to Sydney 1000kms next year. This guy is someone to watch, as I’m sure he will be doing some great stuff in 2020. Go Mark!
At 90kms, I met up with Jon again. I was feeling great by this point. Any anxiety and self doubt had melted away. I grabbed some Clif Bloks and some new Tailwind filled soft flasks and then I was off towards the waterfall. As I left the Checkpoint, I moved into second place and I could see the guy that had been leading all day was now completey broken (by Grant). Grant’s pacer explained that Grant broke him on the hills and it was clear that Grant was in fantastic form. I increased my pace hoping to catch up with Grant but when I finally caught him before the turn around he was 6/7kms and at least 30/45 minutes ahead and looking super strong.
Despite this, I had a wave of Euphoria around 95kms that sent me into another dimension!! This was the first of 2 or 3 moments of pure bliss during this race. What a beautiful trail this is, wow!
The trail down to the waterfall was stunning but sketchy as F#$* ! As I returned back to the Checkpoint at 100kms, the sun was going down and I couldn’t figure out how the runners heading down to the bottom of the waterfall in the dark would navigate back up the slippery single track on the return. I was glad to get this section done in around 13 hours and it felt good to be heading back towards some more runnable trails.
I chatted briefly with the checkpoint crew to find out how far the American runner was behind me. I still wasn’t sure if I’d broken him but I knew I’d held a decent pace on the climb so I was hoping I had extended the gap. As I left the Checkpoint they shouted, “another runner coming!” and then they all turned to me and laughed. Bastards … but legends ha ha
I met Jon at 111kms and we headed up and over Granite Mountain in the dark. It was so satisfying to finally run with Jon. I really felt like I had let him down at the GNW so it was great to have a chat and do some running. Thanks Jon!!
We did some calculations to figure out how far ahead Grant was and then he appeared out of the darkness on the return leg, earlier than we expected. Still looking strong and running an intelligent and well executed strategy.
Still we kept the faith. Maybe if we put some pressure on him he’ll fade later on. Anything can happen in 100 miles and I told Jon I had plenty of running left in my legs.
We ran and joked and sang … badly! The last 30kms are a gradual decline with mostly single track. As we ran, it felt amazing to share the day with an awesome friend and enjoy the trail.
Then …
135kms into our 162km run …
Around 1am in the morning …
Out of the darkness …
Wild brumbies!
2 brumbies jumped out from behind a tree 10 metres ahead of us, startled and other worldly. It was absolute MAGIC! I have been running in Australia for 10 years and I have never seen wild horses so to see them, and connect with them, this close was just a dream come true!
Then I found it. Right there at 1am in the middle of the Hume and Hovell trail with my mate Jon. In the red and white glowing eyes of a wild brumby!
My WHY.
Seeing that noble, wild, four-legged athlete, made me think … WHY does a brumby run? Because that’s what a brumby does. That’s what a brumby was born to do. They are following their true purpose and expressing their fundamental nature.
Maybe my WHY is as simple as that. I run because I’m a runner. I was born to run. I love running and everything that running has brought into my life. I run because the best part of me is expressed and energised through my ability to move. I run because it brings me joy.
Jon and I had some issues with headlight batteries that we ultimately resolved. I fell over a fence that thankfully wasn’t electrified. We jumped over some snakes and laughed and then we finished.
2nd place – sub 22 hours – WHY? … Because I’m a runner and I love it! 😀 x
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